Eating Lying Down

I never understood this, but one of the most common fears people who aren’t familiar with the way I function have about me is that I will choke because I usually eat lying down on my side. I’ve been doing this for nearly 29 years at this point, and so far so good. I’d say that’s a pretty good track record. I can think of one time where I legitimately choked on a carrot, but that was because my cousin was goofing off and making me laugh hysterically at the dinner table, and I inhaled as I was chewing. Apparently I turned a little purple, but I did manage to cough it out without breaking any bones, and I was totally fine. Oh, and by the way, I was actually sitting up during this episode. Let’s just say my aunt banned me from carrots for the rest of that trip.

This whole thing reminds me of one of the anecdotes I included in my book, Looking Up, where a stranger was awed and amazed that I could eat chicken wings all by myself. Here’s a little snippet for you:

The level of stupidity of people just amazes me. Not too long ago, one of my friends and I were having lunch at WOW Wingery in Clearview Mall before catching a movie. Because I lie on the table to eat (it’s just easier for me), I can see where someone might think I’m younger than I really am.

I was lying on the table while my friend and I were talking and enjoying a nice plate of wings. All of a sudden, this old lady came out of nowhere and exclaimed to the mall, “Oh my goodness! She’s eating the chicken wings by herself!”

Now, you tell me what to say to that. I’m not even sure what was running through this lady’s head, if anything. Maybe she thought I was a baby eating chicken wings? I have no freaking idea. My friend almost choked on her chicken wing, I was like, “ummm…yes…?” That’s all I could come up with at that point… I was shocked!

Looking Up is just $10 on Etsy! Go get a copy today!